Oracle boss Larry Ellison issued a classic non-apology apology yesterday at his company’s OpenWorld conference. Here’s what he said.

“A year ago, I was a no-show at this conference on Tuesday. So I’d like to take an opportunity to apologize to everybody, but we were desperately trying to come back from an 8-to-1 deficit in the America’s Cup and every day was sudden death but somehow we made it. So, again, apologies.”

Apologies for what?

It would seem that he is apologizing merely for his inability to be in two places at the same time.

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